This week I wear ugly walking shoes
Recently I was given a pair of those chubby, stack-soled “fit” sneakers*. You know, the kind that look a cross between that very special footwear you can only buy at a chemist and those foam stilts Baby Spice used to wear with legwarmers back in 1993.
* I was given Reebok EasyTone’s. But MBT‘s are very popular. So are Skecher’s Shape-Ups. This is not an endorsement…but so many of you have asked for the details!
Such shoes come with claims: they are said to lift your bum, increase your heart rate, zap cellulite, solve your existential angst, sort your tax return and nab you a new partner. That last one, of course, is made up. These shoes are so ugly, they’re known universally to deflect potential suitors as soon as they see you coming (in life-improving, calf-elongating strides).
Lifted bum or no lifted bum.